IV Unspoiled Brats - Qin Yuke: Love stories are the best to hear.

Qin Yuke, born in 1978, holds a master's degree in art at Université de Paris. He is undergoing an important self-transformation process right now.

What I really want to tell you is a love story involving me because I think love stories are probably the best to hear. Like the stuff in movies that takes your breath away, the truly heartbreaking stuff.

But unfortunately if I tell you my love story you might be very disappointed, because I have never experienced love, and I have never loved anyone.

You might think that's incredible and in fact only three or four of my closest friends know this. I basically never raise it with anyone else. I think nobody will believe me or even if anyone does they will think it's a joke.

So what exactly is the problem?

In the abstract I like boys and I have known this since I was very little without ever feeling confused or wanting to deny the fact. I believe this is a very normal physiological phenomenon.

The problem is that in life I have never met the kind of person who rushes over and says "let's fall in love" nor have I ever said this to anyone myself.

Perhaps this is because I am too idealistic about romance.

I always hope to naturally encounter love in my life and to have such a story occur naturally. But the probability of this happening in actual life is practically zero an impossibility, because I feel the frequency with which men and women meet is already so small much less people of the same sex.

I'm also not that willing to go to those regular meeting places so I've been waiting all along up till now.

Of course when I think about it sometimes I feel this is quite sad and perhaps it's the last reason why I haven't gotten baptized because I haven't figured this out.

I first encountered Christianity in class and was deeply affected by it and I've said my Acceptance Prayer. But I haven't been able to figure out what God's intent was in setting up my life like this.

Of course God loves every person but is his arrangement for me an expression of his love or what exactly. Of course from another perspective I sometimes feel that maybe God really does love me very much, because he has kept me from experiencing these conflicts and saved me from these earthly sins - these sins born of love.

But sometimes I think this is a very depressing thing because youth without love isn't worth shit. A loveless life isn't worth mentioning either.

Sometimes I also think about many people are probably dissatisfied with their lives and try to do things to change them. So now I am doing something to make my life more interesting too.

I'm getting a facelift to change my current very strange appearance. I'm in the middle of the plastic surgery process now.

First I got my Botox injection and slimmed down my face. Then I did the ends of my eyebrows, I took a piece of scalp from the back and grafted the hair onto my eyebrows. Then I ground down my nasal bone for a nose job though recovery has taken a long time and I'm still wearing an immobilizer.

Most importantly I shaved off all my hair and tattooed along my hairline. The tattoo's not done yet — it's about two-thirds done but you get the idea. I'll keep going it maybe needs another two or three days though the needle really hurts.

Of course there's another very important reason that I changed my face — this is an art project of mine.

I have recorded every step of the surgery and want to put on a show using photographs, installations or maybe video to present my facelift process step by step.

I hope I can have a fresh attitude and appearance to face the unknown future.