When West marries East

Updated: 2013-02-13 14:20

By He Na (China Daily)

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Cultural differences

They have never really had a big argument during the course of their marriage, but life is composed of trials, and it is inevitable to come across small frictions. Their way of showing anger is to avoid speaking to each other for one or two days.

"My wife is very generous and often gives in first. We make progress after each 'battle'," Bourdaud said.

He recalled that every morning Sun would ask him to put on more clothes when he went out, and he used to get annoyed at her nagging.

"The French like pursuing freedom. Come on, I am not a kid," Bourdaud said. "I didn't understand that in China to nag means to deeply love."

On the contrary, he never reminds Sun of the same.

"I thought you need to give her freedom when you love someone. But my wife thought that me not saying those words means that I am not caring for her," Bourdaud said.

Bourdaud has spent many Spring Festivals in China and he often thinks that the activities for the holiday are too dull: "People leave after the meal, and that's all."

He said he still prefers Christmas. "We will have a big meal too, but many other activities as well such as playing games, dancing, singing or doing some sports, which are more fun than only eating."

More disagreements are appearing when it comes to their child's education. Bourdaud prefers to teach his one-and-half-year-old son to be independent, but he said Sun and her mother spoil the boy too much.

Generally, Bourdaud said he liked the role of being a husband and son-in-law a lot.

"If not for my Western looks, sometimes I even forget my foreign identity," he said, adding that he does not understand why many people point out the cultural and conceptual barriers to transnational marriage when even people from the same village can get divorced.

"China is getting better, and I like the country. I want my son to receive education in public Chinese schools and hope he can be a real Chinese."